- Train minimally up until this point. Maybe do a 8 or 9-miler the week before, and maybe string along a few 3-milers during the week.
- Two days before your run, go to yoga for the first time in seven weeks. You'll want really tight quads. Trust me.
- Pick the hotest day in the past two weeks to run. Because you love the heat and humidity
- Don't eat dinner before you go running. Instead, about three hours before you leave, eat a bunch of cookie dough. Then lay on the sofa immediately regretting that decision.
- Forget to make ice that morning. Remember how hot it is? You certainly wouldn't want your water bottle cold during your run.
- Leave for your run during rush hour. Friday-before-the-holiday-weekend rush hour to be exact.
- Once you get to your desired starting point, start off running way too fast the tempo of the music you're listening to. Sub 10 minute miles definitely bodes well for such a long distance.
- Drag your lifeless body another mile. Repeat 11 times.
- Once back to your vehicle, collapse into the dirt and stretch. Repeat until you feel like getting up.
- Chug that bottle of ice-less water you stashed in your car. Then begin to drive home.
- Pull over. Throw up the water you just drank. Keep driving.